Chronic Illness Truths

I met a woman named Julie on Sunday. I was giving away yarn from my stash that I will never use and she knits hats for homeless people. She also has health issues and understands what it is like to change your life to accommodate your ailments.

Anyway, Julie is writing an anthology of stories of people who are living with chronic illnesses and is looking for people to contribute their story by September 15, 2015. You can find out more on her Tumblr site here.

I find the idea of me writing about life with chronic illnesses intriguing. I have written a lot about life with cancer and my cancers are probably more treated as chronic and not terminal illnesses. They are also not acute illnesses meaning they won't go away. My cancers are symptomless, for now but they could always return, which just adds to the fun.

Life with a chronic illness which is symptomatic is very different than one that doesn't cause a lot of pain. My life with degenerating disks started to cause me some pain in my back and hips. The my life with RA and fibromyalgia is loads more fun. I have pain in many more places and it has changed my ability to work more hours and my ability to get a good night's sleep, walk any distances, stand for more than a few minutes, and all sorts of basic things in life.

I think I will write something for Julie's anthology. If any of you feel the need, check her site and write something yourself.

Does blogging=journaling?

I just read this article about the benefits of journaling - taking pen to paper. The claims are it benefits your immune system, blood pressure and lung and liver function as well as allowing the right side of your brain to be creative.

It also gives tip for getting started. But I've clearly already started. As long as blogging equals journaling. While I am not putting pen to paper, I am putting hands to keyboard and my right brain is working (I hope).

The tips given are:

• write consistently
• consider starting each day writing
• never self edit
• write about the good, the bad and the ugly.

I would add to that -  if you have a brain like a sieve (like me), you can go back and read what you wrote so you can remember what you actually did that day. And ignore whatever your high school English teachers told you. Mine told me I couldn't form a cohesive paragraph and would never be a writer. But she was old and cranky too.

Who reads your blog?

This is a real question. I started writing my blog to keep my family and friends up on my cancer adventures in 2007-2008. Very few of them every read it. I know my mother reads my blog. An old family friend who lives in France reads my blog. The rest of my family to the best of my knkowledge does not read my blog.

My husband does not read my blog unless I prod him but his point is that he is living it so I give him a lot of slack on that.He usually knows more about me than my blog does.

Of my closest friends, one who lives far away, reads my blog regularly. I have one good friend who lives locally who reads my blog regularly. Most of the ones who live closer do not read my blog. Its not like I talk to them any more often than I talk to the one who lives far away.Every so often, I find out that someone else I know reads my blog. Some facebook friends read my blog too.

I'm not complaining. I'm analyzing and thinking - even though its early in the day.

My intention was to have friends and family read my blog so I wouldn't have to write emails or answer calls on my on going cancer adventures. That did not work out.

My daily writing has helped me developed a coping mechanism where I am journaling my life experience through on going medical disasters. Since its not my friends and family who read my blog for the most part, it is my impression that the other readers consist of other bloggers, cancer friends who I have met online and complete strangers.

At first I was a little bit frustrated by the fact that my intention not to have to call and email people updates didn't work. But now I really do not care. If they say they are my friend and don't bother to ask me about my health and they know I have issues. Are they my friend?

For most people who breeze in to my life and call me up and ask how I am doing, I give them a vague answer because honestly its too complicated to answer a single question. What part do they want to know about - my latest developments, my RA progression, my fibromyalgia stability, my last blood work, my upcoming tests? Its not a one sentence reply.

So the people I had hoped read my blog do not. There are  many people who read my blog and give me feed back. Sometimes posts get picked up here and there and more people read them. But that's okay. So who reads  your blog?